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Friday 27 September 2013

Men... a strange phenomenon...

where would we be without them?

My thoughts and feelings about these 
wonderful creatures...

Why do they walk purposefully
up to the village each Saturday and
Sunday morning to get the papers.

Who suggested that beer
might be a good beverage 
for them to quaff?

Why do they always lie
when you ask...
'Does my bum look big in this?'

Football, cricket, golf...
is it the balls?

An obsession with remote controls...
A Freudian answer... 
possibly around
willies?

Who came up with the idea than
women should be swathed
head to toe in fabric?
Not a woman surely?

Why do decent men feel the
need to pick up the tab when
out on a date?

What bright spark suggested to
men that it's not a good idea
to talk about your
thoughts and feelings...
Stiff upper lip and all that stuff?

How come it's okay for a woman to
say things that a man never could?

Why are men better poets 
than women

How come men of all ages
know all the moves of 
Daddy dancing?

Why do men try not to cry?

Any to add?








11 comments:

  1. How come men start wars? How come men don't shave their armpits? How come men are happy to fart like buglers? How come men are inexpert users of bog brushes? How come men always go topless on beaches when women don't? (Come on ladies!) How come men don't notice when a room needs decorating? How come there's a Women's Institute but not a Men's Institute? How come men don't like women using their razors? How come men pick their noses? How come decrepit old men still "check out" young women with a twinkle in their eyes? How come old people's homes are mostly populated by old women?

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  2. In answer to your last question... because 'Women are the weaker sex!' is a myth.

    LLX

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  3. Despite your puzzlement your list makes it seem like you live in a world full of old-fashioned gents.
    The antiques world, on the other hand is full of the blokes on Yorkshire Pudding's list.
    My question is - why do men never remember what you've said 5 minutes ago, 2 hours ago, yesterday...?
    Trouble is, I know the answer to that!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Don't we all darling girl... they don't flaming listen.

      LLX

      Delete
  4. Yorkshire Pudding added all of mine Linda. I love your observations on life, oh I have just thought of a one (look away Mr T) why do men never 'see' mess?

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    Replies
    1. Surely you know the answer to that Jayne... Mr T only has eyes for you!

      LLX

      Delete
  5. How come men can never find their keys, glasses and have to shout for help in order to do so. Usually hiding under their jumper, newspaper or in jacket pockets, but for some reason unable to locate them by themselves.
    I have a constant shout for misplaced hammer, saw, tape, drill bits... Yet I have never touched them.
    Oh... And one more thing.... Why can't they wring out the dishcloth properly before wiping kitchen work tops ?
    Julie x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Imagine the scene, the washing up's done, the kitchen looks clear... but wait, what is THAT noise? It sounds strangely like the march of feet, faint, but definitely there. Searching around you discover the noise is coming from the direction of the burial mound that is the sodding, sodden dishcloth. The germs have got down and dirty in the wet, tepid atmosphere that in their little world is so conducive to lurve. As if by magic, babies appear and prepare to find pastures new... that is the sound of a bug insurgence.

      Julie I totally get it! ' One more thing'... my eye!

      LLX

      Delete
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    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hello Michel, thanks for commenting. I have no desire to twitter; I go on enough as it is; as all the folks who know me will testify.

      LLX

      Delete