is a refrain that is often heard reverberating around the ole homestead.
Reasons why I'm a handful...
1. I'm an only child, never EVER spoilt
2. I have a high pain threashold (what's that got to do with the price of cheese in Woolworths?) and wait for it...
a low boredom threshold
3. Excitement courses through my veins,
and without a some madcap scheme to keep me occupied the
escape from my rosebud lips.
4. My head is always full of ideas,
some of the more notable ones...
Hampers in the Highlands
Living a self sufficient life on the NW coast,
I came up with the idea of supplying hampers
stuffed with home-made delights
to the folk in holiday cottages.
In the eighties certainly not heard of...
Well perhaps Fortnum and Mason's.
Trouble was I was too tired with spinning, knitting, milking, cheese making,
bee keeping, peat digging, veg growing - you get the picture!
On the farm in the Vale of York...
Worm farming, ice cream making,
101 uses of cow muck...
brickettes for burning,
a fragrant fire you'll agree
bricks for building,
you've heard of wattle and daub
and so on.
A high point was my idea to open a
Wholefood Transport caff
Selling absolutely NO CHIPS!
Eggs in the form of egg white omelettes,veggie burgers,
served with a myriad of salads
Bulgar wheat, quinoa, cous cous
Beans of all sorts, colours and hues...
Wind by any other name
Seeds, to make the truckers bounce with health
Wholemeal bread, buns and baps.
Cakes, of the healthy kind.
Flapjacks, with only a passing nod to their first cousin -
the breeze block.
Decaff tea served in bone china mugs
Peppermint, feverfew, chamomile and Roos
Decaff coffee passed through the cleansing waters
A gym to ease their tired bodies,
Shelf upon shelf of mind enhancing books
The broadsheets, no red top here.
A diary of drop-in self improvement events
Pilates, tai chi, zumba, yoga
Massage upon request...
a quick rub down with a damp FT to
invigorate mind and aching bod.
My son Aaron on being told of my cunning plan
pored scorn on the idea.
I'd like to say from a great height, although that would be a
slight exageration, due to him rolling around on the floor holding his sides.
Is it any wonder, that I'm hugely misunderstood?