Tuesday, 24 July 2012

Training is well under way...

1.   Job lot of Louis Vuitton sweat bands bought

2.   Cases of energy drinks ready chilled...
Champagne with the addition of Kir for extra vigour 

3.   Salt and Shake crisps to replace the salt depleted stores

4.   Wrist support as worn by the lovely Madonna; for the good hand, which wouldn't have had the extensive training that
my now defunct and sorely right hand has had

5.   Stella McCartney on 24 hour helpline in case of
Lycra fatigue of my specially commissioned boned and corseted
Olympic kit

6.  High Carb. hampers taylor-made by Abel & Cole 
for the toppest of top athletes - like what I is. 
Delivered four hourly...
'Always complete the course in order to
gain maximum dietary effect'

7.   Hourly rub-down by my coach with a damp copy of the Sporting Life

8.   Double strength throat lozenges for the cheering hoarse throat

9.    Fruit flavoured Rennies to settle over-excited antacid tums

10.  Learn the words to 'God Save the Queen';
in order that we don't have the indignity of Lesley Garrett singing it for us.



  1. Ha Ha! You are really getting in the mood.
    When I heard Ms Garrett warbling the other day I said to Mr N.
    "Is she metamorphosing into Dame Clara Butt?"
    "Dame Clara Boobs, more like" he replied.

  2. What you really mean is....that you have your cushions plumped; TV tuned; bubbly and flute at the ready - not forgetting the Cheesy Wotsits; ready meals in the freezer....for the next two weeks??

    (Good to know I'm not the only one who can't stand Ms Garret - she makes me cringe!)

  3. Oh Linda, you are a tonic, you just make me laugh out loud every time,
    thank you!!!!! When is your first event taking place? x

  4. And this is all just for the Synchronised Water Zumba Dance Class Event.

  5. What larks girls! Got a 'orrible feeling you are all getting to know me oh so well. Think I'll try enigmatic for a while - that'll fox you!