After I picked myself up from the floor...

I carefully replaced the receiver

"Crumbs!  That little ploy didn't work."

And I thought I was being so clever.

Within a few days a sheaf of papers arrived with full instructions and a date for me to attend the first round in a catering college in Middlesborough.

From the two thousand plus applicants, they choose twenty from each region to compete in the non-televised round.  They obviously want to see what your food is like and also how you perform under pressure.  From those twenty they find the best three in that area.

In the application I had submitted my menu of

Hot sauce of smoked wild salmon on a green salad

Oxtail with hedgerow jelly with bubble and squeak parcels

Baked Bramley apple with cobnut stuffing and cardamom custard

My style of cooking has always been British with an interesting twist

I was planning to drive up to Middlesborough in the pick-up, however the morning had other ideas.  

Thick fog, a regular visitor to the Vale of York.

"As the weather's so bad, please will you take me to the station?"

"Can it wait until the cows have had their sugarbeet?"

Powered by expletives ********** I roared off down the drive...