Saturday, 11 May 2013

Call me an old

cynic, and you'd be 100% right.

Looking for a particular recipe today,
I thought, rather than plough through my
1001 cook books I will google it.
There she blows,
Just what I'm looking for...
 on a blog.
Imagine my surprise to find that just about every
ingredient, had been sent to the blogging tart in question.
Not content with just photo's of the ingredients, there were links to
the company as well.

Twenty years ago, getting to the final of Masterchef,
I was amazed to be invited out for tea at
the Savoy, by a kitchen appliance company...
I ought to qualify that...
a real person, not the company; 
I've been on some strange dates in my life
 but never a whole company.*☺

Never the sharpest knife in the chef's tool roll,
I naively thought...
What a lovely woman.
Delving into her capacious handbag, she
produced the current product list.

'Let me know what you would like and I'll arrange to have it delivered!'

I thought I'd died and gone to heaven.
I chose three items, mindful of not being too greedy.
Little realising that I was being positioned 'on-side'.
What they didn't know was I always say what I think, and if I think
something's not up to the job I say...
'It's crap, not fit for purpose!' 

The iron fist in a Marigold glove.
(and no I haven't got a container load of Marigolds in the attic).

Alright, you could say, giving talks of my life, were a form of
prostitution, and in part, you'd be right.

Pint of beer in the members bar in the House of Commons -£2.60
thanks to the taxpayer subsidies... Why?

Doctors getting freebies by way of drug company jollies... Why?

Councils giving huge payouts to retiring staff. Spending our money on fact finding missions to discover the meaning of potholes in the Kyber Pass.
When our roads resemble the surface of the moon... Why?

Bankers' bonuses... Why?

Bonuses of any kind... Why?

The Royals and celeb's being bombarded with gifts... Why?

Police and Crime Commissioner... Why?

The Party Whip... Why?

Just when was it exactly, that greed
crept up and bit so many folks' bums?
Making them feel they had discovered the meaning of life.


*☺  (This reminds me of a witty one-liner a friend came out with, about a mutual pal.
      'I didn't know Geena could lay floor tiles.'
      I said full of admiration.
      'Well she's had enough practise, what with her laying the entire Russian army!'
      he replied.)



  1. Human nature, LL. More nasty grabbers than nice sharers. Was it ever different?
    Perhaps - briefly - people were less greedy when they feared hell fire & damnation.

  2. Thanks for commenting Nilly. A friend said she had read it and didn't understand what I was getting at. So with no comments, I thought perhaps everyone else thought the same!

    That's the trouble when I get all hot aroung the collar, fire off a blog, sit back feeling so much better and no one gets the gist.