A flavour of our Saturday...

Looking for a new interest?

"Meet the Village"

Organisations supporting the community, 

such as the Parish Council and the police service, 

will also be present to offer advice.

Opening by the Mayor of Tunbridge Wells

Councillor Elizabeth Thomas

Greg Clark MP will also attend this event

Light refreshments available

PLEASE COME AND FIND OUT

WHAT THE VILLAGE HAS TO OFFER YOU

***

I ask you how could we refuse?

Off we trudged up the hill, 

happy to be seen to support our local community.

There was a method in my madness, while Hubs bought our beef from the butcher,

I nipped over to the chemist to buy my 

Dr. Hauschka lotions and potions.

Well, at my age the laughter lines need a little light help.

We then nipped down the alley to my most favourite shop...

Village Life.

Hubs always winces, when I say

"I'm just off to see Kate"

This time, my modus operandi was to take him with me.

Girls will know why.


Then into the village hall we fell.

The sight was truly amazing: why didn't we know what excitements were to be had just a short walk away from our front door?

W.I. - No - Why?  

 After giving hundreds of talks, 

I had a complaint from one of their groups.

  The reason... I said bloody six times.  

In my defence this was a verbatim conversation I was recounting.

Local History Society - Yes - Why?

They meet in the winter and only for a couple of hours once a month.

We can't leave Lettice (our much loved pooch) for long these days.

Quilter's Group - No - Why?

 I caused havoc in the sewing class and don't really feel the 

refined lady quilters are ready for my Bott type strops.  

Plus I don't think my graffiti quilting would go down a storm.

Gardening Club - Maybe - Why?

To avail myself of cheap deals in dung and stuff.

Although my 'let the plants lay out their stall' form of gardening 

might be frowned on by the horticultural great and good.

Local Am Drams - YES - Why?

I'm a BLOODY diva that's why!

I toddled home with a whistle keyring, personal alarm 

and supermarket pound keyring thing,

(Don't they know at Waitrose, they trust their customers not to nick the trolleys?)

all pressed into my hand by the very nice Community Support Officer,

who obviously thought I looked frail and in need of personal protection.

(The blooming diet must be working)

All safely back I brewed coffee, then waddya know,

it was time for the papers and wotsits.

Alright I know... thunder thighs.

***