As I said to Helena...

Bonham Carter only this morning...

'Last night I saw your muff!'

Before you fall back in a dead faint...

I ought to explain.

Last night we watched 'Wings of a Dove'.
This morning on the front cover of 'Culture'

who should grace the front page but her-

lovely corsetted, gloves up to her pits, self.

Now if there's one thing I like, really, really like... its a wacky woman.

She epitomises that person... fluff'n'all.

As I endeavour to age gracefully...

(that'll gett' em rocking in the aisles)

my eternal interest is hair in all its forms.

By the early morn light I sit by yonder window for a quiet pluck.

In days gone by, hairy caterpillars would arrange a pow-wow

right on the bridge of my nose...

not anymore!

As I wage war on the chin and tache, suddenly I

realise my eyebrows are balding by the second.

But wait...

Where is the hair going?  

It sure as hell isn't marshalling forces to protect

my womanly front-line.

'We shall fight on the beaches,

we shall fight on the landing grounds,

we shall fight in the fields and in the streets,

we shall fight in the hills;

we shall never surrender.'

Let's take time out to remember all the men who gave their
lives for us to enjoy the freedom we have today.

And as flippant as I am, and as flippant as I will always be,
I will never forget their bravery.